One of these days, I am going to become a highly sought-after commercial photographer. Brands will hire me to shoot their campaigns. I will get to pander to others’ creative visions,
OR maybe I will find clever ways to pimp out unnecessary products to people I don’t relate to. Either way, it is guaranteed there will be plenty of ass to kiss. Adventures with women like Lanie Morgan will be a dirty secret of my past. I can’t wait. Eat Tic Tacs.